Sunday, June 07, 2009

a new chapter begins.. it's been awhile.
i sat for my exams (yet again!) in early may. i left it to God. if i pass, great. if i dont, then i'm still a doctor, and can just continue giving my services to the public... either be a service (chronic) medical officer in paeds, or join the peripheral health clinics. a friend suggested that i quit the ministry and open up my own clinic. kinda scary, but perhaps do-able.
my brother suggested that i adopt a child if i dont make it through the exam. he said maybe it's time i concentrate on something (or someone) else other than sitting for exams.
um, o-kay. that's even more scary!

so... thank God i passed!!*phew*

which means that i would have to leave melaka. this would have been my 8th year of staying far the 2nd longest time i ever lived in a place. (i spent the 1st 12 years of my life in kl, then moved about 3 boarding schools in melaka, taiping & seremban for 7 years, then spent 6 years in canada). it was a mixture of emotions leavingmelaka.. there were a lot of memories built there, and i'll definitely miss it.

so here i am back in kl, transferred to a university hospital, and back staying with my parents. the last time i actually stayed with them fulltime was back when i was 12. then i went to boarding school for 7 years, while they went overseas to work, till my mom retired about 3 yrs ago and came back to msia.
intially, i had mixed feelings about staying with them, how ever much i love my parents, and happy to have them near me, the thought of living with them together in the same house fulltime was a bit.. i dunno.. ?invading.. ?kiddy-ish ..?scary.. ?less private..
so far, a week has passed, and working at the university hospital is just soooooooooo much more different than working at a ministry hospital. it's much more demanding, exhausting, depressing, confusing at times, and really degrading to me.. to see us doctors getting yelled at by the professors, snuffed at by the nurses, the horror stories of a few dcotors who got knocked on the head (literally).. i mean, even school kids are not being treated like that anymore!
so i know, that in order to get through it all, and survive the next 3 years there, is to actually swallow my pride, ditch any ego that i may have, bring down my self-esteem to a bare minimum, learn my lessons, pass the exams, and then get the hell-outa-there.
so having gone through a dreadful week so far at work, i'm gonna just bite my tongue and say that the fact that i actually get to come home after work, to the old house that i grew up in, with mommy dearest there to greet me (and home-cooked food ready for dinner :)) made me really glad and appreciate the fact that at least i'm home with my family, and thank God that i get that privelage.

best wishes, me!