me joining the department one month ago, and reporting to the boss on the 1st day.
boss: do you have a family?
me: umm.. yes.
boss: how many kids?
me: oh no.. not married. no kids. i mean i do have a family..like my parents and sibs and such.
boss: ha.. good, then you have a lot of time in your hands, can study. nothing to distract you.
boss: you must be smart, you're in the masters now, cannot just study from the books. must read journals, go on the internet, attend conferences. haa, and you're single, night time you dont have anything to do, go attend drug talks, sometime they have these talks that they can sponsor you for. you just go-lah, get educated, also get free dinner.
me: err..(nod my head)
a new junior boss joins the department. senior boss overheard talking to her PA about him.
senior boss: is he married?
PA: yes, he's got 2 kids i think.
senior boss: aiyah. susah la.
now, the senior boss has no intention to ngorat the junior boss, trust me, although it's easy to misunderstand the conversation. she just prefers people with no kids so they can commit 110% to their work. for some reason, they think that if you're married, and especially if you have kids, you get "distracted" more.
i was talking to a couple of colleagues about this. seems like the generation gap is quite huge in the department. the senior bosses are the type who goes to the hospital any time of day, even on the weekends, even though they dont have to. the junior bosses are around to look after the rest of us and the patients of course. apparently few of the seniors, even when they are away on vacation, will have people text or call them to inform about the patients!
the commitment is admirable of course, but i think it is more about trust than anything. they just couldnt trust the junior people.
they also dont get it that these people take leave to see their kids off on their 1st day of school.
they dont get it that they must oversee the kids doing their homework at night (let the teachers worry about that).
they dont get it that we need at least a couple of weekends off a month to be with the family and friends.
they say things like "my daughter is 13 years old now. i never actually get to see her grow up as a kid .. i cant believe she's a teenager now".
these people breathe, think, talk, eat, drink, live and die of hospital and medicine. it's their life.
but not really desirable.
not for me anyway.
i'm single yes, but i still have a family, friends, and a life i want to enjoy and spend time on, other than just my career.
i dont think they will get that.