Monday, September 18, 2006

these are not their real names..

these are stories of real relationships of real people that i know. they're some good ones, and some bad ones. however, their names have been changed to obviously protect their privacy :) if u ask me whether these stories affect my own views on relationships..umm.. yeah.. cant help that they do actually.

1) john & leyla
they met at university and fell in love. they were evrywhere together. evryone knew about them. got married after graduation. got 2 kids. became working parents. one day, he told her he wants her to know that he's getting close to a woman at work..BUT she's more like a little sister than anything, AND yes, they hangout quite a bit at work, BUT nothing's going on..she was having some serious personal problems with her family, AND has no one to turn to, SO he's just helping her out. he was telling her because he didnt want her to get any wrong ideas if she were to hear about it from other people first. leyla didn't completely swallow evrything though. but she accepted his explaination. she did remind him that they both should remember that particular conversation that day(and by they she meant him).
then about a few months after that, he broke down in front of her that he's in love with the other woman (yeah, the one he was treating "like a little sister") and he felt really guilty cuz he really loves leyla too. they both cried and he promised her he will leave the woman because he didnt think he could live with the guilt. and he couldnt imagine leaving the kids. leyla accepted his apology, and his promise.
a year later.. john & leyla divorced. he broke his promise (apparently he couldnt stop loving the other woman no matter how hard he tried) and married the woman. leyla got custody of the kids, john gets to visit them once a week. according to leyla, he just visits them twice a month now, at the most.

2) yana & bob
yana studied in the east. bob in the west. first time they met, yana fell in love with bob. she travelled to visit him any time she could. they kept in touch. she told bob how she felt. bob said he felt the same way. he graduated earlier and started working. she continued on with her studies. they talked about getting married after she's done. by the time she graduated, they had gone out for 5 years.
then he told her that all these years they were together, he never actually "loved" her. he went along with the relationship cuz she was such a nice person and he didnt want to hurt her. most importantly, he didnt want her studies to be affected if he told her earlier.
yeah. he's such a saint.
they broke up. not long after, bob got another girlfriend. he's now married i think. yana is successful and still single.

3) wan & elly
the couple was introduced to each other by a mutual friend. he was studying overseas, she locally. they kept in touch, saw each other whenever he was back home. fell in love. got married after graduation. they're now expecting their 1st child.
the cool thing was that, when they each told their parents about the other, they found out that their parents were actually friends way back when wan & elly were little. the 2 families used to have meals together, and wan & elly were actually playmates. they had lost contact with each other after evryone moved away, and the kids were just too young to remember each other. wan's mom found a yellowing photo of the two families together with the 2 kids sitting right beside each other. she cut the part out, enlarged it, framed it, and they had it displayed on their wedding day.

4) aidan & shasha
they were colleagues, became friends, became lovers. problem was, they were of different religions. shasha has strong faith in her beliefs, and aidan was willing to convert and marry her. shasha's family were accepting. aidan's father had a heart attack when he told the family about her. aidan couldnt take seeing his father so ill and so disappointed. shasha couldnt take continuing the relationship in secret, not knowing if they will ever have a future together. but they were still so deeply in love that they ended up still seeing each other anyway. but when they bumped into aidan's parents one day, it was obvious that his parents were still very upset and were not giving in. it was then that aidan said he couldnt choose between his family and shasha, he loves them both. shasha said he would have to.
he chose his family.

5) deedee & russell & anne
russell and deedee knew each other from the internet. he was open from the beginning about being a married man. deedee was in a long-distance relationship. they became friends. she broke up with her boyfriend, but didnt tell russell right away. she felt that the friendship is "safe" as long as they know that each were not available.
he then confessed he was falling in love with her. she refused to accept. he's married to anne. they have 5 kids. he claimed he's never experienced true love with anne. they were just neighbourhood friends. anne was actually marrying another guy, but just a few days before the wedding, the guy broke off the engagement. russell's mom then told him to be a man and save his dear friend from embarassment. and he did, "replacing" the groom on the fixed wedding date. 5 kids later, he told deedee the above, and proposed.
at first she didnt fall for it. but he was such a "wise, mature gentleman" and he loves her so much ..and you know what they say, (apparently) it's best to be with a man who loves you more than you love him..hmm.. and so she later accepted his proposal, and became his 2nd wife.

6) norma & aaron
norma was working in a tin factory after high school when she had an unfortunate accident. the tips of her right 4 fingers had to be amputated. after marrying aaron, she became a housewife. he was only a laborer, working hard to make ends meet. after the amputation, norma had phantom pain in her fingers, made worse evrytime she does manual laundry (the bristles of the brush gave her chilling pain to the bones). when aaron found out, he worked harder than ever and made enough to buy her a washing machine. norma nagged him about it of course. he just shrugged it off.
aaron's father's health was ailing, and his mother hated norma. did evrything to make him leave her. aaron stuck by his wife, ignored his mother..but instead of leaving his old parents though, he actually built a house right beside theirs so he can still keep an eye on them. norma had a terrible time but never left his side, never returned the attack and abuse (mostly verbal but they were a few physical ones too!)from her mother in law. their strong patience paid off though. the mother in-law actually repented and now they have a healthy relationship.
then, during norma's 3 rd pregnancy, she developed really bad hypertension that persisted post-delivery. aaron was so concerned that he called me frequently throughout the pregnancy and after to ask about medical things, how to help his wife, what her blood tests meant, etc. he would take days off work when she was ill, even if it meant being fired from his job, to help cook and take care of norma and the kids.
he moved from one job to another, all the while with his wife supporting him no matter how difficult things got. now they have 4 healthy sons, he's running his own business, they paid off all their debts, are doing very well .. and still the humble and loving couple i've always known them to be.

2 comments:

aku2257 said...

hv no idea how to drop a personal msg to u..
so have to comment here...
nothing to do with ur blog
i once had a site
http://360.yahoo.com/nuruzul_idzmir
i'll continue the blog
check out blog pasal amirah

aku2257 said...

so i started blogspot
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